"Can You See the Real Me?" Being known at church (or elsewhere).

Just this week, a former children's minister within Sovereign Grace Ministries was sentenced to prison for years and years of child abuse--abuse which persons within the church ignored and covered up.  Why?

Friday, I met a man at the ATM whose girl friend just left him after they began attending a fundamentalist church--one of my former churches.  He was heartbroken.  Why?

Because you can't really be known at most churches!

At most churches, parishioners place their pastors on pedestals--which St Paul rebuked the Corinthians for doing.  They (we, me) want someone that we can latch onto that seems to have it together.  It's like we're confused Prostestants--we actually want a mediator with Jesus.  We want a mediator, because we are taught to hide our real selves from one another at church and, therefore, we learn to hide our real selves from God.  So, we want a pastor who can present himself holy and unblemished before Jesus on our behalf.  That's why churches cover up child abuse.  Of course, the congregants tell themselves that they don't want to bring dishonor upon Christ or the church.  But that's not it, they don't want to bring dishonor upon themselves!


In Quadrophenia, Pete Townsend begins with the song about being known--"Can you see the real me?"  As the album rocks along, Townsend writes about the conflict inherent within all of us:  "Schizophrenic, I'm bleeding quadrophenic."  But, when we go to church, we generally show one side of ourselves--the bright, shiny face of someone who has it together and whose family has it together.  If the pastor has to be unblemished, then so do the congregants.  We wear masks--we're not known--no one sees the "real us."


Remarkably, they don't do this at some churches.  Recently, I heard a sermon from Tullian Tchividjian in which he said that he was disgusted with himself.  He didn't want to go to his daughter's dance recital  (as guys, we've all been there).  He then became convicted that all he thinks about is himself.  He was disgusted that he wakes up thinking about himself and goes to sleep thinking about himself.  This is the type of self-revelation, of honest preaching, that can actually change people.  This is the type of church that won't cover up child abuse.  This is the type of church where congregants can be known.

When we are known, all kinds of crazy things happen--people forgive one another, wives stay with their husbands, husbands stay with their wives, children love their parents, parents love their children--long-dead relationships are made new!  We actually begin to enjoy our estranged siblings or parents.  Our children become friends with our friends.  And when this happens, as Pete concluded Quadrophenia:  "Love, reign[s] over me."