Paul Zahl says that nostalgia is longing for a time of emancipation. When were you truly emancipated--when you were playing with your grade school friends. These feelings of emancipation and playfulness are wonderfully captured in movies like: The Goonies, It, Stand by Me, and recently Super 8.
About a dozen years ago, I purchased a road bide. It wasn't for exercise (at least not primarily)--it was to try and recapture the wonderful times that I experienced with my grade school friends. We each had 10 speed bikes, and we went on many trips--often up to 25 miles. Our parents didn't know where we were going. In 1970s Tuscaloosa, our parents probably didn't need to know where we were going. My memories of the camaraderie and adventure with my friends still warms my heart, still conjures up a longing for those times. Am I unique in this? I don't think so.
Every time that I have seen these friends again, what do we talk about? We talk about all of the times that we got together and rode. We don't talk about disappointments that came later in high school--we talk about those wonderful times of freedom, camaraderie, and adventure.
When my middle son, James, was 8 or 9, I bought him a road bike. Unfortunately for James, none of his friends had road bikes. (How come so many adults have road bikes, but kids do not? Maybe many of the adults are hankering for their childhood, like me.) Since none of his friends had road bikes, James rode with me. We had many good times together, but it wasn't the same for him as it was for me when I was a kid. You see, James was riding with his dad, and not his friends. No matter how good our father/son relationship was, it couldn't provide the camaraderie and adventure of being with friends. So, as James became 11 or so, our rides together became less and less frequent. (By the way, kids probably don't have road bikes today, because we as parents are afraid to allow them the freedom due to traffic.)
So, what does this have to do with "true happiness." By the Bible's definition, true happiness arises from our fellowship with God and man. True happiness doesn't come from achievement in life. We want our children to follow their dreams, but dreams are always, always "dead ends." My dream was to be a respected attorney and partner in a fine law firm. What happened when I achieved that--I had daily thoughts of suicide for a year! I wondered--"Is this all there is to life?"
This led me to re-focus my primary attention on my family and friends and, by God's grace, on Him. This has led to freedom to be a lawyer, not duty. This has caused me to be a better lawyer. My dream is now reality, but it came from relinquishing that dream and embracing relationships. Most importantly, this has brought me happiness through my fellowship with God and man (my wife, my children, my co-workers, my wonderful friends on Facebook, and my brothers and sisters in Christ.) My current relationships remind me of, and point me back to, those wonderful times with my grade school friends, and they point me forward to the new heaven and earth that we will experience when we leave this life.
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