Jesus didn't command many things, but He did tell us to "call no man father, since your father in heaven is your only father." Jesus, obviously, wasn't referring to our physical fathers, but to those that we might view as our spiritual fathers or perhaps mentors. Why this commandment? Aren't we to revere or elevate other persons?
No, the answer is: "No!" When we revere others, we create huge problems for that person and for ourselves. Pastor and author Steve Brown notes how we place preachers on pedestals. The revered person is put under pressure to perform, pressure to live up to expectations. This inevitably leads to their fall. When they fall, we lose faith in what they stood for.
A friend, Paul Zahl, said that his parishioners always wanted to call him "father" when he was an Episcopal priest. Paul did his best to discourage this, but to no avail. Only after he received his doctorate did they stop calling him "father," then they began calling him Dr. Zahl. Paul probably wouldn't think that that was any better.
When a person is revered, they lose touch with reality. Their identity becomes the one that others place upon them, instead of their God-given identity. This leads time and time again to horrific consequences. The most public recent fruit of such reverence is the story about "Joe Pa" and Penn State. Had Paterno not been so revered, I suspect that Sandusky would have been brought to justice more than a decade ago--many fewer children would have been molested. This appears to be confirmed by the fact that Sandusky was arrested only one week after "Joe Pa" became the winningest coach. This hardly appears coincidental.
This message is also for me. When Bear Bryant died, I cried, really cried. I was 22 when he died. I didn't know him personally. Therefore, I had no reason to grieve except for the fact that I revered his success as the Alabama football coach. I robbed him of his identity in Christ, just as many PSU fans robbed "Joe Pa" of his God-given identity. It is perhaps noteworthy that Bear died within 2 months of retiring as football coach. You have to wonder whether his reason to live was gone? Was his identity gone?
So, who do you revere? Your pastor, a football coach, an actor, a rock star, a co-worker, a mentor. Let's be fair to such persons. Instead of revering them, let's love them. Let's treat them like anyone else. Let's free them from the bondage of our expectations.
How about respecting their contributions, appreciating how much they have personally helped you, appreciating if they made the world a better place, but all without idolizing them? Without some extra form of respect shown to those who achieve a lot, what is to distinguish them from those who contribute nothing? I agree that there is an issue with turning humans into demigods, but the idea of not giving some a bit of extra deference is a bit of a stretch to me.
ReplyDeleteYour friend, Paul, probably didn't like what "Father Paul" implied, some sort of final authority on subjects. He should be congratulated for his self awareness. It doesn't mean that he didn't know more than the average parishioner. After all, how helpful could he be if he didn't know a bit more?
Bear Bryant and Joe Paterno deserved more respect than your average coach because they accomplished more, helped more people. However, they both became detached at the end of their careers. Idolization is bad, but respect, appreciation and deference still seem good to me.